bread is delivered with warm toasted almonds, warm fresh olives and a little shallow dish of sea salt, and butter

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In these parts, the ultimate form of dinner appreciation is to please clean and shatter your plate. Yes, shatter it. Then if you wouldn’t mind, kindly toss your cookies in the parking lot of the Beverly Hilton and call it a night. I don’t know how it’s done in other parts of the world, but that is how we do it here.

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Buckle in and roll ‘em up friends, we’re going for a little ride. All of my ‘drafts’ dating too far back will be incorporated into one dangerous post. I understand the risks of holding your attention through all this self involved information. This is my blog bitches, stick around – I’m just getting warmed up.

>First up, the last episode of The OC. Carefull y’all, I doubt you’ve stepped in deeper puddles. Marissa Cooper is D-E-A-D? Coop? COOP?! They played ‘Halelujah’ as she slipped away from this cruel world that never understood her anyway?! I guess the writers were glad to see her go. Jalalujah! FOX, why do you hate Marissa so? WHY.

>Moving right along, Venom: Not The Band, The Lip Gloss. As a longtime glosser first time blogger, Lip Venom remains my favorite. It’s cinnamon, clear, thin, not sticky, perfect alone, or as a primer for some light color over the top. The packaging kicks the competition’s ass too with this cardboard tube that’s perfect for holding stray pills. Am I losing you yet? I’m going to finish strong, I promise.

>Next, a Grammatical Bulletin – The Apostrophe. Sorry to keep you waiting so long! Lets get right to it, for most of my life my name involved an apostrophe conveniently located between a rediculous arrangement of vowels. This little bugger was single handedly responsible for missed flights, incorrect credit cards, drivers licenses, marriage certificates, social security numbers, gang related turf wars, you name it. Even now with my tidy and definitive married name, the apostrophe still haunts me. Most recently he’s parked his obsructive little ass on a background check. Trust me on this one, you menacing bastard, there’s much worse than you in my tainted past so don’t even try. Please refer to this, I’m the hottie on the right.

>In Husband news, it ain’t easy being The Evil Overlord of the Criminal Underbelly of the Internet. Chris is working at myspace these days. And every time I turn around there’s another story about how it’s destroying the fabric of our vulnerable youth. I think it’s what you call a zeitgeist, this myspace dot com. Thank the lord myspace wasn’t around when I was a teenager. I probably would still be prisoner in Brunai performing sexual favors for some pervy sultan I agreed to meet at the roller rink in 1988 for an innocent game of Centepede.

>Finally, here are some pics from our recent trip to Sonoma.


Where we stayed, the Inman Winery at the Olivet House.

Dinner at Charlie Palmer’s Dry Creek.

Hawian Blue Prawn – fava beans, applewood smoked bacon, spring onions, oregano oil, tomato broth

Hog Island Sweetwater Oysters – on the 1/2 shell with verjus mignonette, sambal cocktail, lemon

Dungeness Crab Cake – smoked eggplant fondue, Love Farm’s sorrel, caper remoulade

Alaskan Halibut – artichokes, cipolini onions, tomato confit, boquerones, taggiasca olives, basil oil

King Salmon – poached with shrimp tortellini, young asparagus and five herb butter

Bacon Wrapped Pork Tenderloin – Tokyo turnip, fondant potato, braised Love Farm’s greens

Fourty-Eight Hour Braised Short Ribs – herbed mashed potatos, asparagus

Delicious Chocolatey Mandariney Moussey Desert to share with coffees and dessert wines

Ps. Note to the beautiful and charming Mary Leslie: Send me the quotes – I repeat – Send me the quotes. Kisses!
{tags lip gloss marissa cooper sonoma apostrophe yes}

While Christmas shopping, Cat Attack with Chaos Wand Technology and the Purrfect Mood Detector was presented to me by the always elusive yet supercool Japanese company Takara. I’ve been silently stalking them for years since they released Meow Lingual in Japan only. Watch the Quicktime movies and you’ll see how irresistable they are and probably have to buy them too.

Later, with their collars ablink and chasing the chaos mouse around – it was like a kitty rave in here. Afterwords, both cats melted into the carpet with ecstasy and the mood went from rave, to straight up cuddle party. Which I think is the natural progression of those two events anyway.

{tags weekend cat blogging cute kitty cat attack with chaos wand purrfect mood detector}

Yesterday I was in the checkout line at Bristol Farms where I was witness to the bleeding edge of male fashion. He says to me ‘Oh where did you find that?’ about some grey salt I was buying. And as I turned around to point to the aisle and laid eyes upon this earthly incarnation of god’s glory – the angels did sing. His keen sense of style was disorienting while my brain processed the ensemble before me and began to comprehend the details: a Malibu Beach t-shirt tucked into vertical striped boxer shorts. Black socks and dress shoes complimented by a white canvas man purse. No pants and a shirt tucked into his boxers with dress shoes and purse. I’ve had my moments but when confronted with such greatness its hard not to get a little weepy.

{tags salt malibu no pants}